MeganDawn_Writes as MystikCeleste

  "What's the point?" I'll be honest, I have asked myself this question too many times in this last week.  I know some of you are thinking that this is a ridiculous and very dramatic way to react to my car giving out on me. But this was just one more block of the many that have been thrown in my path since September. And when you have too many types of anxiety - including paranoia, PTSD, and panic disorder - sometimes being rational is just beyond comprehension.  Full disclosure? I feel like things have been one thing after another since April 11, 2023. And I have wondered, many times, if I am being punished for my failure on that day. It's possible I have not dealt with that day as well as I thought. Or at all... And, just when it seems that things are finally going to go my way, something new happens. Yes, I know that most people feel like this at some point in their lives. But for me, with my disorders and history, these feelings can manifest into feelings of f...

  Life gets hard and it gets messed up When you give so much, but it's not enough When the high's too high and the low's too low When you love someone and they let you go Don't you let it kill you Even when it hurts like hell Oh, whatever tears you apart Don't let it break your heart Time takes time to heal it You can't do it by yourself Oh, whatever tears you apart Don't let it break you heart. - Don't Let It Break Your Heart by Louis Tomlinson released in 2020 on his album Walls Okay, I know I used this song in the last blog. But it's just that good that it fits this one, too. Anyway... This whole finding myself and healing thing has been a very long process. It started back in October of 2018, when my last relationship ended. I had to face the knowledge that I had - for the 3rd time in a row - allowed myself to get in a relationship with an abusive, narcissistic, controlling person. That realization didn't sit well, and I went a bit crazy for ...

  I can buy myself flowers Write my name in the sand Talk to myself for hours Say things you don't understand I can take myself dancing And I can hold my own hand Yeah, I can love me better than you can - Flowers by Miley Cyrus released on January 13, 2023 Truly a great song. Only a week old and it's already a favorite. There are many things to admire about Miley, but her music is right at the top of the list.  If anyone is looking for the definition of someone who has traveled to the edge and pulled themselves back - look no further than Miley Cyrus. The girl has been through so much and has come out stronger and braver than ever.  The song is a perfect look at her strength and determination. And a stunning anthem for singles everywhere.  Realistically, most humans just cannot stay single. We are, inherently, creatures of comfort. The need for love and connection burns through us like a raging fire. Just googling 'the human need for love' brings up article after art...

  There's a moment you know, you're fucked. Not an inch more room to self-destruct No more moves, oh yeah, the dead end zone. Man, you just can't call your soul your own. But the thing that makes you really jump Is that the weirdest shit is still to come. You can ask yourself 'Hey what have I done?' You're just a fly the little guys - they kill for fun. Man, you're fucked if you just freeze up Can't do that thing, that keeping still.  But you're fucked if you speak your mind  And you know, uh huh, you will Yeah, you're fucked alright. And all for spite. You can kiss your sorry ass goodbye. Totally fucked, will they mess you up? Well you know they're gonna try. - Totally Fucked from Spring Awakening: The Musical, as performed by Jonathan Groff, Brian Charles Johnson, Skylar Astin, Jonathan B. Wright, and Gideon Glick. Written by Duncan Sheik & Steven Sater A great song from the fantastic and controversial Spring Awakening. This musical bec...