Fandoms, Social Media, and Celebrities ... The Scary Side

 "If I wanted to have the life of privacy and protection and freedom and wholeness, I knew that I wasn't going to be able to be exposed to all of the faceless, voiceless, nameless people on social media." - Andrew Garfield, March 2022, The New York Times

This statement is such a powerful one. And a very sad one. Because it is way too accurate. 

Just 8 years ago, I was able to enjoy real actual conversations with celebrities on Twitter. I was not active on Instagram back then, but from what I have heard, it was possible to do so there, as well. 

When I say actual conversations, I mean it. I would comment on their tweet - whether it was related to whatever show or movie they were in at the time, or just about whatever was going on in the world - and they would respond. There was a back and forth of actual conversation. It was glorious. 

Then, for 3 years, I was not able to spend much time on social media and I lost that contact. When I came back, the world of social media had changed. Now, when I was commenting on something, those same celebrities were not responding, at all. Some of them were not even active anymore. 

At first, I chalked it up to their busy lives. Many of them were now married and had children. And their careers had taken off like a rocket. But, as I started to read the other comments that were being left, I began to form a new theory. Fandoms were now the problem. 

Let me be more specific - the darker side of fandoms are the problem. Social Media has allowed those fans to become needy and judgmental and far more outspoken with their toxicity and hate. I learned about that side of fandoms the hard way when I was heavily involved in the Supernatural fandom. 

I used to consider myself a member of many fandoms. But too many of them have become so negative that I now just consider myself a dedicated fan. I still interact with other fans of my favorites, but I am much more careful about who and I am involved on a much smaller scale. 

Honestly, as sad as it makes me, I don't blame celebrities for backing off social media. Hell, I can't even read most of those comments without wanting to tell someone off or throw my phone through a window. I can only imagine how it makes them feel. And Instagram Live comments ... Holy Hell! Some of those 'fans' are just straight up insane and delusional. 

As a fellow fan, it is so depressing and overwhelming to try to read through the comments, looking for sane fans to interact with. I keep trying, though, because I love talking about my favorite shows, movies, actors, musicals, and all other geeky things. 

For the most part, my conversational comments get lost in the shuffle. As pointless and hopeless as it seems, I do still comment on tweets and Instagram posts and Instagram Lives on the off chance that the celebrity or a fellow, sane fan will see it and respond. 

And it does happen. There is one that will post every so often. And on the times that I have commented on his stuff, he does like my comment. There have been lives where my comment about the topic has been seen and brought into the conversation. And there are some that, if I tag them, they will reshare it. Those moments, as rare as they can be, are so worth it. After all, the point of social media is supposed to be able to engage and interact - respectfully and rationally, of course - and be able to have a conversation about stuff. 

Of course, I hold no ill will against those that do not interact. Like I said, I get it. And I will remain a dedicated and honest fan. After all, they have their own lives and owe me nothing. But to the ones that do, thank you. Thank you for remembering that some of us are true fans. And thank you for being able to weed through the insanity to find us. 

I know there are some that will read this and wonder why it matters. They will think that this blog is silly, because who cares about having a real conversation with a celebrity. 

But for me - an artist with a deep, empathetic soul - there is a driven desire to be able to connect with and talk with the artists that inspire me and move me. Not in that 'OMG, I love them and want to meet/marry them. They are the most awesome person ever.' kind of way. But in an 'I am genuinely interested in your art and what you were thinking and feeling during that time.' kind of way. 

UPDATE - Originally posted on August 8, 2022. Twitter is pretty much a non starter, these days. It's mostly just a right wing, conservative dumpster fire. Instagram is still popular, though. And, sadly, is still as scary and delusional for celebrities. More and more of them are posting less and less actual posts. Most of them have cut back to only posting stories that do no allow any reaction outside the obligatory Instagram heart. Even I find myself - on the rare occasion someone does an Instagram Live - wishing that I could turn off the comments. The toxicity of the fandoms is terrifying. And the delusion of some of these people - well the men in the little white coats should be knocking on their doors. As for me, I have managed to find small communities that share my appreciation for certain actors, shows, and movies. We talk about things and debate things and share theories, fanfic ideas, video edits, and hopes for future projects. We don't stray into their personal lives, we don't imagine ourselves in love with any of them, and we don't feel the need to threaten to burn down the world because they left a project. We appreciate the time and the work they give us and wait, patiently, for the next one.