The American Obsession with Celebrities... When Does It Become Stalking?

 I'll come out in the morning and get my newspaper and they're there. You feel like an animal in a cage. They visit everyone's homes and sit outside. They look at you like 'There's one.' And I get it." - Keanu Reeves, Interview with The Sunday Telegraph in 2019

I am not a celebrity. Nor do I ever hope to be one. I do hope to write with and/or for some of them, someday. And, I am definitely a fan. 

I have been a fan of celebrities for most of my life. The list changes with the times, of course. Though, there are a few that have been constant for 15, 20, even 30 years. 

What can I say? I know what I like.

What I don't get are the 'fans' that get so obsessed that they can tell you every little detail of someone's life. They can tell you their favorite food, who their best friend was when they were 5, and who their 3rd cousin on their Dad's side of the family is. 

It amazes, and terrifies, me how deep some people will dive into their lives. 

For me, I don't need to know any information that they are not talking about or sharing themselves. I don't need to hear rumors and other people's opinions on if this person is a terrible person. All they are judging that by are the rumors they are hearing, anyway. Rumors are useless and hurtful and a waste of my time. 

There are celebrities that I am a fan of, and have been for a long time, and I couldn't tell you if they are married or have kids or where they grew up or where they live now. Because they don't talk about it. Which makes it none of my business and I don't go looking for the information. 

That is just one side of the American Celebrity Obsession. 

Then there is the other side. The people that are so critical and hateful and judgmental. With Social Media in the mix, now, it is even worse. All the comments about how celebrities need to 'stay in their lane' and just focus on their movie or tv show or whatever they are working on, are ridiculous. 

So what? Just because they are famous, they're not allowed to have an opinion on the state of our country or what is going on in the world? Wrong! They are people, this is their home and their world, and they are just as entitled to express how they feel as the rest of us. 

The one that makes me even more angry is the whole 'oh poor rich celebrity is upset.' What does the size of their bank account have to do with anything? They don't lose their ability to care just because they have money. 

It's clear that these people don't understand what goes in to making a movie or tv show. Contrary to popular belief, it is not a glamorous job. It is long, hard days with little sleep. It is hours and hours on set with little time to eat. It is months away from family and friends and loved ones. It is a stressful life and why so many shows have a revolving cast. It is why so many celebrities disappear for weeks at a time after filming wraps. And it comes with the anxiety of your every move being overly scrutinized. 

Frankly, I find celebrities to be very brave. And maybe a tad crazy. 

But most of them do it, because they love telling the stories. They love providing an outlet of entertainment and escape for the rest of us. Sure, I know there are some that are just there for the paycheck. But show me a job where that is not true. How is them working for a living any different than the rest of us? 

Are these ruthless people jealous because no one knows their names? Are they mad because their childhood dreams did not come true? I am sure that both of these are true in most cases. It is so much easier for these people to spew hate and jealousy than to point the finger where it belongs - at themselves. 

Reading the comments on social media is so scary. I can only imagine how the celebrity that they are aimed at feels. It's no wonder most of them have this feature turned off or do not bother to read them. It sucks for those like me that really just want to chat about what they have going on. But I get it. 

And the Instagram Live comments - Holy Hell! I wish I could turn them off, myself. Every time I see these comments, I feel so bad for whichever celebrity they are aimed at. I can only imagine how exhausting it is for them, to see all that. 

And how scary it must be. Do you know how many times I see - over and over - someone commenting that they 'love' the celebrity. And I am not talking in a casual 'oh, i love that guy' kind of way that most of us have. I am talking full on 'omg I am so in love with you' or 'I want to marry you someday' kind of way. This is where I start to worry about stalkers. 

Before going on, let's clarify. Yes, everyone has that one celebrity that they fantasize about - that sneaks into their dreams, every now and then. Even I have this celebrity. There is nothing wrong with that. Even celebrities have celebrities that they dream about. We are all human, after all. Most of us know that our dreams are just that. We are not making inappropriate comments or believing our fantasies will become reality or declaring our love. Because we are smart and rational. 

Honestly, it's a miracle that celebrities still do anything on Social Media. Don't get me wrong, I am very grateful for the ones that do. Even though I miss having conversations with them, I am very happy that they are still there and still sharing with us.

I also get why some - like Andrew Garfield, Daniel Radcliff, Dylan O'Brien, and Jonathan Groff stay away. I really don't blame them at all. Like I said, I know how the crazy makes me feel and it's not even aimed at me. I don't blame them for not wanting to engage or even see it. 

To all the celebrities that I follow, I will ALWAYS be that fan that will stand up for you and defend your honor when I see it being torn down or someone makes disparaging remarks. I have done so many times and will continue to do so. 

Originally posted on September 22, 2022

UPDATE - Not really much to update on this one. It's all still true and still applies, today.